Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; the trouble starts when they try to decide which one.
In your life, you will love someone so much you could eat them! Then you will get married and wish you had.
Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewellery.
They lived happily until they got married.
I went alone on our honeymoon. My wife had already seen Niagara Falls.
An unmarried man has no buttons on his shirt. A married man has no shirt.
We have a quiet home life. I don't speak to her and she doesn't speak to me.
My wife's a water sign. I'm an earth sign. Together we make mud.
Marriage is one of the chief causes of divorce.
A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.
I never knew what real happiness was until I got married; then it was too late
If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say, talk in your sleep.
It's not true that married men live longer than single men. It only seems longer.
Marriage is nature's way of stopping people from fighting with strangers.
An errant wife is like a jigsaw puzzle. When you come home and find a piece missing, you don't quite get the picture.